I wonder if by chance every words in the world have been use in every combination possible.
I have always been fascinated by what might happen to the future when the present is affected by the past. The combination is weirdly present in the past and will always be used in the future. Isn’t that weird? I mean that combination of words can mean so much yet it only says what is it and nothing more.
A man said, “if you want your words to have deep meaning, speak like Yoda.” I think that is somehow brilliant. We twist our words simply by prolonging how people consume the words bit by bit to make it more meaningful. It’s tiring and so we thought it to be so meaningful.
I believe in something that can be seen on the surface, for something that needs to be understand fully after thinking for a while is tiring. But then again life teaches us that the later part would be way meaningful. To spend time, for time is irreplaceable, therefore it is priceless. It’s weird how life teaches us things we don’t really understand until a certain time of our own life. We see things in a way others won’t.
These random words will always be a meaningful part of my way of expressing my thoughts. A lady said something that I’ve always been asking myself, “I have always wondered what’s going on, on other peoples mind.” Somehow it is scary when we wonder why we can only listen to our thoughts but not others. But I guess that is what the previous paragraph tells me.
Every time I come back home, spending time with old familiar faces, talking about what was and what will be, always fascinates me. Sometime you just have to just look back, in my way, meet people who were so dear to you and realising that they still are, to really understand what you are looking for in life.
If only I can make someone feel so much just by writing:
I would make everyone understand how hard is it for someone who is living life being bullied.
I would make people understand how much does faith values in the world that is so full of uncertainty.
How love can be so overrated and still is underrated at the same time.
That the word ‘friends’ are so important that it is hard for me to even consider someone else as a friend.
I smile just because I’ve been struggling with my life everyday, knowing I have so much things that I left undone and I will not stop getting it done one step after another.
I miss a person on that certain time.
How I wish I can make a difference and trying so hard to make myself a better person.
That my dreams are not just a dream and I shall strive hard to make it come true.
That by living you will know that life have so much more to offer.
And how everyone is feeling the same way as I do and no one else is different.
In my country, racism is an unbearable thing to handle. Coming off from a different race can mean a whole world here. Racial background will ever be the cause of blindness towards one’s eyes to see others as human. A man once said, we have always look at someone else’s face that we forget to realise that we never had ever been able to see ourselves in person. Only reflections and pictures. Yet we are so being judgmental towards others.
The video is from the ever-lovely late Yasmin Ahmad. Portraying the difference of racial background, love, education, and friendship. More if you want to put it.
All this short post brings me the feeling of unsatisfaction. Knowing I hardly ever have anytime alone for myself to think and put it in words readable are annoying.
Thoughts are never readable and even if it is, I reckon it will be understandable to others than the thinker themselves.
Another short post will end with another random poem, or maybe just words. May it or may it not affect your life is another story.
“Dreams of dying
Nightmare of living
Worthy of dying”
I have tonnes of stuffs that is still unsettled. No internet at home and slow connection inside the campus plus having a hard time getting any reception is killing me.
And the campus is so-called trying to produce a top in the field graduate student with this kind of environment. I’f say they will succeed briliantly. Just don’t expect any credits coming from the student.
Crappy ranting. I am trying not to post anything like this but just bare with it. I felt so in debt with you people who follow this blog for not giving any update.
4wise man said “let it be”.
I say life sucks anyway
You know, as you try to leave to somewhere that you know that you hate most, eventually you’ll understand the meaning of living your life the way you wanted it the most. Yes, I’ve been enjoying the past six month of my life a lot. Yet nothing last forever, so they said and it is true.
Life have so much to offer, so they said again. But of course life will have its up and down and no matter what, always keep it in you mine that the first line still aplies.
Though I will not leave for somewhere that is so far away in terms of distance from where I call home, I will be far away from all the life that I loved most. I landed myself with a partnership offer that well, not so bright for me to take so I turned it down. I published my own zine along with my friends and got my article being read by a lot more people than I can imagine. Volunteering at soup kitchen, thank you Syaq for introducing me to the ever lovely Pertiwi Soup Kitchen family. Taking care of the orphans over at the Rumah Titian Kaseh. And so much more.
All that I ever wanted to do, I thank you all of my friends and family for that.
I will go to another chapter of my life now and finish it. Thank you for spending time to read this and have a wonderful day ahead.
Ps. I write this on my phone. Sorry for the grammar mistake if I did not corrected it.
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